Your wedding is one of the best days of your life. The last thing you might therefore expect as you start your happily-ever-after is a case of the blues, so why does research show that as many as one in ten women suffers from some form of ‘post-nuptial’ depression?
Most of us experience a sense of let-down after something we’ve enjoyed or looked forward to for a while; it’s that feeling you get heading back to work after the Christmas break or when you arrive home from an amazing holiday. There are few life events bigger than your wedding so it’s perhaps not surprising that this same sense of anti-climax can rear its head once the big day has passed.
Another big factor and potentially a more controversial one, is the often unrealistic expectations that couples can have of what wedded life will bring. We all know that a marriage is about more than a big, expensive party but it’s impossible not to get caught up in the excitement of it all and maybe even to start believing that it’s going to be dramatically life altering.
Whilst marriage is an amazing milestone for your relationship, the reality is that very little will actually change. Daily life is sadly nowhere near as exciting as living in the reflected glow of an upcoming wedding; the housework still needs doing, you will have the odd argument and the bills still need to be paid.
So what can you do to try and beat the post wedding blues? Here’s my top tips…
EXTEND THE CELEBRATIONS //
Arrange a post-wedding picnic for your guests, get your nearest and dearest over to watch your wedding video and don’t forget the biggest post-wedding celebration…the honeymoon, whether you research it, book it or head off on it!
DON’T FIGHT IT //
Accept you’ll feel a bit down for a little while. It may last a couple of days or even a few weeks or months. Planning your wedding will have become a habit (maybe one that you’ve had for a couple of years!) which has now been broken. You’re bound to feel a little bereft by the gap left behind so don’t beat yourself up about it.
TRY A LITTLE PERSPECTIVE //
The chances are you’ll only remember the highs of planning your wedding – the excitement, the attention, the shopping etc, but try to recall the parts that weren’t so fun. Remember all that wedmin, the pressure on your bank balance, maybe even the odd family quarrel? Focus on those memories and you’ll probably find yourself quite glad that the planning process is over.
TALK //
A problem shared is a problem halved so talk to your new wife or husband about what’s going through your mind. Feeling sad after your wedding doesn’t mean that you’re shallow or not serious about your marriage. You’ve taken a vow to support one another so don’t be afraid to ask for help if you need it.
FILL YOUR TIME //
As you plan your wedding make a note of all the things you want to do but can’t because you have to address 150 envelopes or rework the seating plan for the zillionth time. Or simply make plans with your new wife or hubbie; a special meal, date night at the cinema or a trip back to the location where you met or shared your first date.
Love,
About the Author
Rachael is a UKAWP accredited wedding planner and the owner of Lovestruck. Based in Berkshire, she’s been helping couples across London and the South East to plan their perfect wedding since 2012.
She loves epic checklists, heartfelt wedding details and country walks (as long as they end at the pub.)
Her dislikes include all flying insects, bad timekeeping and most wedding chair covers.
Get in touch today and tell me all about
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